We need to ask our boys questions so that we understand what they think they know about sex and intimacy. Supporting these victims is necessary and compassionate. But I quickly learned that reacting with anger and judgment did not help anyone. My job, after listening, was to find an adult in the building they trusted, an educator who could help them find the support they needed. I thought I was supposed to talk to the girls. The boy, sweating, fidgeting, eyes downcast, tells me his story. And then there are the half-confessions. They are not ashamed; they are ill-informed.